What’s up with the paper labels on shower gel bottles?
Are you trying to kill me?! I always manage to get the little buggers all over my body. And that’s annoying even for that short while.
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The most boring
I am sipping coffee from my brand new “Drama Queen” in capitals mug, getting ready for a day to complete my identity card and other tasks. In thirty minutes I will have to rush out the door, but until then I can browse old pictures and remember. I think Belfast and Strasbourg compete in my head for the title of “Most boring city I have ever visited”. Clean, civilized and plain boring. But maybe I am mistaken.
What are you trying to say, Hamlet*?
Should you cry or should you laugh when your boyfriend calls you that?
* Hamlet, you know, the crazy guy
List of lists
What made my day: getting out of the house, taking the metro, getting the money, paying a debt, buying lunch as a birthday present, not just agreeing to my request but actually extending help, assistance in shaving my head. Basically, about my friends.
What made my misfortunes, lately? Like suffocating in my sleep? Or stopping the car trunk in the later mark on my back? The food poisoning? The depression? Spending the weekend on my own? The diet? The heavy debt? The need for change.
The equivalent in movies is: Chicago, American Splendor, Rome - season 1, 16 Blocks (with Bruce Willis), Shrek (all three), Lock Stock and Two Smocking Barrells (brilliant, of course!), I have seen again Mulholland Drive (and again I have not understood a thing, I wonder how come Lynch has had his Hollywood success), Monty Python.
Socks-in-flops
I swear taking the subway is very revealing. Apparently the season is open all over again for socks in your sandals, flip-flops and the like.
Plus, if you are a true lady and have kept your purse, the fancy one! with big metal handles, in the rain, OIL IT! Otherwise it’s going to sound like you are carrying a big rusty door with you at every step you take, and I am going to crack up with laughter.
Royal feast with mint tea and dry snacks - she suggested a diet intake
My doctoress was really happy to see me. I find that nice. But I also find that awkward. But then I finally find it nice.
I hate Smecta and trying to keep hydrated. Probably part of the strategy is prescribing me so many pills that I’d actually have to drink while I am medicating. I get bloated with anticipation of each pill.
Goodbye, my plastic life!
One of the somehow most expected birthday presents this year was the expiration of my identity card. Now, call me an enthusiast, but I am looking forward to the thick paper trail laying ahead and to the amount of actual physical effort needed so that the state authorities invest me with a new functional convention: my brand new, perfectly identical document, proving my identity based on domicile (say what? domicile!).
By order of consequence, I am saying, at least for a while, goodbye to my debit/credit existence. Hello cash, again.
That’s because one of the banks, let’s call it the evil one, is freezing my account starting the 31st day after the expiry and until the moment I manage to provide a valid photo ID that includes the residence address. Evil and stupid. We’ll see if banks are at least as stupid when it comes to me paying them back money I owe them. My guess is yes. Cause the last time I did this they asked for my identity card. And that was, of course! at the dull bank
Between these two there is little left, but wait! A third contestant: the we’d-love-to-but-we’re-sorry bank! They first offered me a free of charge card, even sent me the PIN, but now are withholding the activation until said identity card is, you guessed it! issued.
All these while I have not ceased to exist AND I still have other valid photo identity documents, such as the passport and the drivers license.
Welcome to redtape country. Let me show you to your form!
How to avoid presents
Oh, this one is too easy. First you invite them, then you cancel.
Or you get ill. Preferably something contagious.
Or both at the same time.
More about salmonella here.
Compulsion blues
Many many happy birthday wishes later, and I still think the day would have been better spent cleaning the house. Or rendering order in those piles of paper.
I am not built for frustration, but I experience it more often than I should.
As time goes by, it turns out I am more interested in feasible projects.
Related to all of the above, I did the laundry yesterday. Now let me find a picture for you.
Been thinking about it
When you’re born you’re zero years old. Then you turn one year old. Therefore the birthday celebrates the year that has passed, not the one that’s coming. Maybe this is, sometime, the annoying thing with birthdays. They measure what’s gone. In other words I have been 34 the entire year behind me. I didn’t have a problem with 33, 30 was fine. At 25 I took pride in being a quarter of a century into the world. So what do I make of 34? Maybe like they do in buildings and planes, when they skip 13. 34 can be my 13. By the way, I don’t have a problem with 13. So, it’s settled then. I am going on 35.
I am writing about this because I had the worse sleep last night, hot flashes and all. For the first time I have heard my neighbour’s bed screeching. How awkward is that?! And pretty much all the noises going around in my block of flats. Veve’s called just as I managed to fall asleep, and the ring scared the living light out of me. She was having a beer in my honour. Thank you 
Plus the spoilers. It looks like a lot of people were afraid to miss my birthday and I kept receiving happy birthday wishes in advance. Oh well, I will try to live deal with it.
As for my new life, I have set my alarm for seven and woke up at six. A.M. Without it. Is that a sign or what?
In other news, the best present has just woke up and kissed me. I am happy.
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