Entries Tagged as 'ROFL'

Thorough indeed

“Thank you, Professor, for your dense analysis !”

Every now and then these false friends play a trick or two on them international conference goers.

Platonic dialogues of my own (he called me a salmon!)

Me: “So. How come you love me? I’m fat, I’m bald, I’m a terrible f*ck…”

Him: “That’s why bears like salmon. You fit all the criteria”

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We interrupt this broadcast

My dog, she is eight, she snores!

I suck, you suck, he/she sucks

From the collection of famous quotes , I give you today an oxymoron that is undoubtedly set to make history.

After a blow job: “Tell me, do I suck OK?”

Rofling

After receiving spam that “misses” me, I have found out today that a certain Marcelle Ndo needs my assistant. … !?

Honey, it’s been a couple of months since I don’t have an assistant.

Am I just being mean here? Because, you see, Ms.(?) Ndo comes from Benin Republic…

Spermcount


What better time to count your eggs, than Easter? If there is none, call your gay brother and not only drop them on him, but also do incidentally mention the possibility of him becoming the gay donor uncle for your child . Do altogether skip repeating the test, fertility treatment, adoption etc.

I am the first!


…if you are looking for Romanian national dog

Mismatch


Sometimes, when you are really down and need a hug and a massage, all life has to offer is a blow job. Which is worth passing if you can see the face of the blower when you say no, thank you.

Quote of the month


By Hiroaphasia: “point the first: I am not clever, I’m charming”. Absolutely! (Me too ;)

Last kitchen action hero (featuring the pink panda family. No animal was hurt during the production of these pictures with my mobile phone)


ROFL-ing, talking about “ginger people”, maybe even a “ginger portal”.

The funniest conversation with T.
Him: “Wanna’ see my photo in Omagiu?”
Me:”what Omagiu? The one issue were I am published?”
Change of face, drop of jaw.
Me: “Is your thing bigger? Let’s see whose is bigger.”
Open Omagiu.
Me: “Yeah, your thing is bigger”
Then, in realization: “But do you have your name published?”
His name is not published.

My American friends were rolling on the floor. With laughter. I was sitting on the edge of the kitchen sink, in retrospective it doesn’t look like a bright idea, but at the time I think the wine also helped in making this kind of decision.

I have also made friends with their three year old. She is the most adorable little human. The plan was to soak her in detergent as she was sliding all over across the tiles in the kitchen and hallways, having the time of her life.